Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla (1974)

Japan's answer to Planet of the Apes.

The word mediocre fails to describe some of the Godzilla movies made in the 1970's. Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla is another feeble attempt at making an entertaining movie out of really nothing good and it does a great job of summing up the problems the Godzilla movies of the era had. It's easy to see where the film goes wrong and watching Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla feels more like a chore than anything else.

As the original Godzilla series was beganing to wind down, long-time Godzilla director Jun Fukuda gives us his last entry in the series. This time around Godzilla must fight a giant robotic version of himself with the help of some sort of monster half lion, half dog creature named King Caesar. This time, the goal is to stop an evil race of monkeys from taking over the earth. The film was, technically, a success. It sold more tickets than the previous entry in the series and managed lukewarm reception from fans and the general public. Honestly it's hard to see why though.

Somewhere between it's lackluster plot and it's cheesy rip-off of planet of the apes aliens, I found myself dozing off during Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla. In a pleasant change of pace, the monsters show up pretty early this time around, but that seems to prolong the wait for the final climax of the movie. The sooner you show the monsters, the more jaded you feel when they don't show up again until the last several minutes. Ultimately, Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla has the same problem as nearly every movie in the original era. It lacks creativity and it focuses far to heavily on it's non-monster plot. You can't title a movie Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla and only spend about fifteen minutes with them fighting. That's just disappointing. I'm nearly done with the original run of Godzilla films and I have to say that I'm looking forward to moving on in my viewing. I sincerely hope the 80's and 90's have better things in store for me.

3/10

Clash of the Titans (1981)

Zeus blesses his son with beautiful hair.

The 1980's were a beautiful time that I'm certain most of us would like forget. More than any other time in film-making, the 80's seemed to permeate every element of the process. Clash of the Titans is, really, a wonderful expression of early 1980's culture. There's the beautiful hair, the excessive, yet unremarkable, special effects and a general sense that everyone on the set was doing cocaine that make Clash of the Titans an awesome time capsule and help it maintain cult classic status.

In some respects, Clash of the Titans is the mythological story of Perseus and Andromeda and in other respects it's 1980's pop nonsense. To make a long story short, the son of Zeus, Perseus, must save the beautiful princess Andromeda from the retribution of the gods. The only way he can succeed is by conquering some of Greek mythology's scariest adversaries. The film stars a lot of no names and, oddly enough, Laurence Olivier as Zeus. More notably, the film is the last major work of publicly unappreciated special effects guru Ray Harryhausen. While it was a financial success at the time the film mostly endures as a cult favorite and has recently garnered some extra attention because of the a recent remake.

There's little remarkable to report about Clash of the Titans. It does have Ray Harryhausen's awesome stop-motion animation, if your not familiar with his work check out the skeleton fight from Jason and the Argonauts, but it doesn't boast a script worth noting or performances worth calling decent. The movie feels entirely dated. The 80's sensibilities stick out like a sore thumb and even the visual effects I called "Awesome" do look a little less than perfect 30 years later.  What your getting with Clash of the Titans is entertaining camp and Harry Hamlin's beautiful hair. I may get some flack for saying it, but the remake of the movie is definitely more successful in the entertainment department. While the new film may be more exciting, the original does have a lot more character to it and it will probably be remembered for that reason alone. Clash of the Titans is best viewed as a time capsule and with the accompaniment of a few drinks and a sense of humor.

4/10 

Thirst (2009)

Korean priest becomes a vampire and develops a foot fetish somewhere along the way.

Being a resident of South Korea has done some strange things to me. Other than wildly altering my sleep schedule, making me a certified alcoholic and giving me first hand knowledge of a legitimately racist country, my time in this place has given me insight into a foreign film industry that is severely underestimated. There are filmmakers in Korea that are putting out legitimately good films, and  few people outside of the country are watching these movies. Thirst is an extremely solid take on the vampire mythology, which blends significant elements from Korean culture into a really interesting film.

If you're not Korean, the names Chan-Wook Park and Kang-Ho Song probably don't mean anything to you. Park and Song have combined to make pretty much every Korean movie of note. Thirst is the story of a devout priest who just so happens to be accidental turned into a vampire. Along the way he must come to terms with his new life while trying to reconcile his sinful passion with a young woman. All of this makes a lot more sense within the context of Korean society, but that's a level the average American won't understand. The question is, is Thirst worth watching for the average moviegoer. The answer is an unequivocal yes.

If there's a genre that has been excessively over-saturated in the last few years it's vampires. Between the Twilight craze and every other attempt to make vampires cool over the last few years, there seems little room for innovation. That's where Thirst really shows it's pedigree. The blending of western ideology and eastern philosophy in the guise of a vampire movie works better than expected. In the end, Thirst succeeds because it feel fresh. It feel new and different from the other vampire films out there and that alone makes it worth watching in my book. It takes a considerable amount from the traditional mythology, you already know all the rules of vampire movies, but it also breaks the rules and expectations of the genre in really pleasing ways. From an insider perspective, Thirst really succeeds because it's an unique look at Korean culture, especially relationships, through a less than traditional medium. On top of the immeasurable aspects, the film succeeds on all the traditional levels as well. the acting is solid and the visuals are just as good.

In the end, Thirst offers everything you could want in a foreign film. While the movie certainly plays better if you have an understand of Korean culture, let me enlighten you, their relationships suck, it also works as an outsider. The sheer uniqueness of the mythology makes the film worthy of watching. Slowly but surely I'm becoming a huge supporter of the Korean film industry and that will likely continue in the future. I wouldn't recommend a film that didn't have universal appeal and Thrist has that appeal. At the very least, it's a vampire movie that will feel fresh and that's worth it's weight in gold these days.

7/10

Pinocchio (1940)

Wooden boy gets taken to fantasy land by a fat, old pedophile.

There is something downright impressive about traditional animation. In a time when most animators were struggling to make short, simple animated pieces, Disney was crafting full-length epics with all the bells and whistles. The original Disney films, the ones made in the 30's and 40's were leaps and bounds ahead of anything else out there and Pinocchio embodies this marvelously. Not only is the technology and artistry phenomenal, but the themes and content of the movie shows a mature angle that children's movies, even today, tend to avoid. Together, these elements make Pinocchio a movie that's pretty special.

After the magnificent success of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs three years prior, the animators at Disney produced Pinocchio. Pinocchio isn't exactly and original story, that's something that Disney will continue to explore in the future, but it has all sorts of Disney twists. A lonely woodcutter creates a son out of wood and wishes for him to live. The wooden boy springs to life only to fail at pretty much everything he tries. Disney's attempt to convince the world that women are truly useless didn't quite match the financial success of Snow White, but it has become a much beloved classic in the modern era. The film won a pair of Academy Awards, both of music, and is a certifiable animated, classic nowadays. At the very least, Pinocchio is a daring, unconventional step for Disney and a movie that still stands out today.

When watching Pinocchio, it's important to remember how impressive the film-making was at the time. Everything Disney produced in the early years deserves to be viewed as technological marvels and Pinocchio is no exception. The animation here is superb and it always will be. What makes Pinocchio stand out even more are the thematic elements. This is a children's film for an entirely different generation. The tone of the movie is especially dark and the language is, at times, questionable. These things make the movie truly enjoyable as an adult. Sometimes Children's movies are afraid of the down and dirty aspects of life that work for all ages, but Pinocchio address these things wonderfully. Pinocchio teaches a wonderful lesson for kids, honesty is good, while appealing to adults with some really disturbing subtext.

When you watch a movie that almost 70 years old, you have to ask yourself why. Some movies the answer to the question is easy. Pinocchio is one of those films. The movie continues to speak to modern sensibilities as well as serving as an interesting time capsule. Not only is the film a masterful technological achievement, but it's managed to stay relevant and interesting for longer than my grandparents have been alive. That alone makes it worth seeing.

8/10